THE LOST MY PARTNER NEWSLETTER  

 

VOL. V, Issue 4    April, 2008

 

 

Brought to you monthly by Laurie Spector & Ruth Spector Webster, authors of Lost My Partner – What’ll I Do?; A Clear, Practical Guide For Coping and Finding Strength When Your Spouse Dies

 

 

www.lostmypartner.com

newsletter@lostmypartner.com

contact@lostmypartner.com

 

 

Hello and welcome to our newsletter!

 

Our long-awaited new edition of Lost My Partner-What’ll I Do? Enlarged and Revised Edition is now available at a special pre-publication discount! Visit our website and discover the valuable new chapters and updates we’ve added to our bereavement guide.

 

Our monthly newsletters will continue to provide you with comfort, reassurance, practical strategies and useful tips.

 

We welcome any suggestions or ideas that you’d like to share with us.

 

Let us hear from you at: contact@lostmypartner.com

 

Thanks for joining us.

 

Warmest Wishes,

Ruth and Laurie

 

 

 

 

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Coming in May!

 

 

The new Lost My Partner; Revised & Enlarged Edition!

 

Pre-order online now and get 15% off the list price.

 

Visit www.lostmypartner.com to learn more and order now.

 

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MONTHLY FEATURE

 

 

AFTER THE FUNERAL; PART I: Not Getting Overwhelmed            

 

In the initial weeks following your spouse’s death, you may find yourself swamped by well-meaning family, friends and others anxious to show their caring and support. Phone calls, e-mails and visits can provide a welcome cushion from the shock and pain of your loss. There may be times however, when all the attention becomes overwhelming.

For those occasions, remember the following:

 

1. Pace yourself. People will understand that under the circumstances, you need to gage your capabilities on a day-to-day basis.
2. If you feel the need for quiet or solitude, it’s okay to say so. Let others know you appreciate their company but recent events have left you depleted and you need to take time to retreat.
3. If others invite you out for a meal or other social occasion, you may be reluctant to decline because out of fear of losing more connections in your life. People will understand if you explain that you aren’t sure from one day to the next how you’ll be feeling and will have to let them know closer to the event.

 

Keep in mind that others tend to feel helpless when a death occurs. The calls, visits and invitations help them feel less so. Your comfort level, however, is what’s most important, however, so help others to really “be there” for you by gently setting some limits.

 

 

 

Coming in next month’s newsletter: AFTER THE FUNERAL; PART II: Once the Visits Stop

 

 

YOUR QUESTIONS

 

 

“My husband died 2 ½ years ago and I haven’t been able to think about dating.  But now I think I’m ready. How do I start?”   Anita V.

 

Depending on your age, there are a variety of approaches: alerting family and friends, taking a class at your local adult school or college, volunteer work, or joining a singles’ group at your place of worship. Our new edition of Lost My Partner-What’ll I Do? offers more suggestions as well as new information and advice about online dating. Engaging in activities that you enjoy for themselves rather than primarily as opportunities to meet men, will probably be the most comfortable options.

 

 

 

Discovered a coping strategy that works for you? Share it with others in future newsletters. Email us at: contact@lostmypartner.com

 

If you enjoy this newsletter, please tell your friends and/or colleagues about it.

 

Receive a 25% discount when you buy the original, Lost My Partner – What’ll I Do? from our website: www.lostmypartner.com.

 

Telephone toll free at 1-877-727-3814.

 

 

(Copyright 2008 by Laurie J. Spector, M.S.W. and Ruth Spector Webster, M.S.W. All rights and all media reserved.)