February, 2009______________________________________________McCormick Press

VOL. VI, Issue 2                                                                  www.lostmypartner.com

                                                                      newsletter@lostmypartner.com

 

 

The Lost My Partner Newsletter  

 

Brought to you monthly by Laurie Spector & Ruth Spector Webster, authors of Lost My Partner –What’ll I Do?  A Clear, Practical Guide For Coping and Finding Strength When Your Spouse Dies

 

 

 

This Month’s Feature: How to Beat the Valentine’s Blues

 

 

UPDATES FROM RUTH & LAURIE

 

With its emphasis on love and romance, Valentine’s Day can be a painful reminder that you’re no longer part of a couple. This month’s feature article (reprinted from our February, 2005 newsletter), puts a different spin on the whole idea of celebrating this holiday. Let us know your thoughts on our approach by emailing us at contact74@lostmypartner.com.   

 

Speaking of which, we’re in the process of creating a blog. This is new territory for both of us so right now we’re just giving you a “heads up”. We’ll keep you posted (in both the traditional and blog sense of the word), and look forward to having a quicker way to hear about and respond to your opinions and questions.

 

You can read more articles from our past newsletters anytime by going to www.lostmypartner.com.  

 

Our website also offers the opportunity to read a sample chapter from our recently released Lost My Partner-What’ll I Do? Revised and Expanded Edition. Find out more at: www.lostmypartner.com.

 

Please stay in touch and share any ideas or suggestions with us. We can be reached at: contact@lostmypartner.com

 

Thanks for joining us.

Warmest Wishes,

Ruth and Laurie

 

 

 

MONTHLY FEATURE

 

 

HOW TO BEAT THE VALENTINE’S BLUES

 

It’s all around you: painful reminders that you don’t have that “someone special” with whom to celebrate Valentine’s Day. Although your spouse isn’t here to share the day, try to expand your definition of “love”. Embrace all the other relationships in your life where you give and receive affection such as family members and good friends. Use the holiday to show your appreciation in some of following ways:

 

1. Schedule lunch or dinner with a good friend.
2. Remember when you were a kid and gave valentines to friends and classmates? Revive this custom with family and friends.
3. Show yourself some appreciation. On a valentine, list at least 2 things you’ve achieved since your spouse’s death that you used to think weren’t possible.
4. Treat yourself to some pampering (a manicure or massage), or buy yourself a “gift” (hobby items or clothes).

 

Remember that your marriage was just one of several caring relationships in your life. This year, begin a new tradition by celebrating all of them.

 

 

YOUR QUESTIONS

 

“My husband of 47 years died about a year ago. One of my friends fixed me up with a man who has also been widowed for a year. He’s asked me out to dinner. Although I’ve accepted, I’m very nervous about being on a date. Any suggestions?”

                                                                        Judy R.

 

Of course you’re nervous! After all, it’s been a long time since you last dated. Although you may feel like a teenager, remember that you’re now an adult and have successfully coped with many different life experiences. Also, it can help break the ice for both of you if you’re just honest and share your own anxiety about the situation.

 

 

Discovered a coping strategy that works for you? Share it with others in future newsletters. Email us at: contact@lostmypartner.com

 

If you enjoy this newsletter, please tell your friends and/or colleagues about it.

 

You can order either edition of Lost My Partner – What’ll I Do? from our website: www.lostmypartner.com.

 

Telephone toll free at 1-877-727-3814.

 

 

(Copyright 2009 by Laurie J. Spector, M.S.W. and Ruth Spector Webster, M.S.W. All rights and all media reserved.)